Reunion Dinner...

Every Chinese New Year (CNY), I dutifully make the 2.5 hour journey from Kuala Lumpur to my Dad’s hometown, Batu Gajah. I have been having reunion dinners in Batu Gajah without fail since.... forever. Except for that couple of years when I was slogging my way through university in a foreign land. Reunion dinners were boisterous and informal affairs. My Dad had 13 other siblings, who had gone forth and multiplied. And 2-3 decades ago, this multiplication process produced an average of 4-5 offsprings. Applying basic Ilmu Hisab skills, you can imagine how many people and children were packed into the narrow wooden shophouse my grandparents called home.

Since there were many mouths to feed and space was a limited commodity, we had to stagger our feasting into two distinct waves. Wave 1 was where the kids were given 10 minutes to pile on our plates, and clear out of the way. Wave 2 was for the grown-ups to settle round the table for the “real” reunion dinner. For Wave 1 participants, dinner was best eaten in front of the TV, watching corny CNY specials. Getting the best seats in front of the TV was a competitive sport worthy of the Olympics. You needed fast reflexes and a quick eye to stake your claim on available chairs and stools. Since almost all chairs were occupied by the adults at the dinner table, the pickings were indeed slim. The most prized piece of furniture usually up for grabs was an old rattan chair. It had arm rests and a back – perfect for relaxing in while shoving your face and watching Pesta Angpow. Chair-less losers end up having meals on the floor – this was not particularly pleasant since we all stomped in and out of the old house with our shoes on. After picking the most comfortable chairs/ stools, the action continues with the race to bag the most strategic spot. Too slow and you’ll be staring at the back of someone’s head instead of enjoying the wonderful spectacle of dancers bopping to the tune of “Kong Si Kong Si Kong Si Ni”.

I really looked forward to the food too. Never mind that the same dishes were cooked up every year. There are happy memories abound of me rubbing my distended stomach with deep satisfaction. Though not very Hokkien in practise, I am a true blue Hokkien in descent. This is reflected clearly in the staples that make their regular appearance at the reunion dinner table....

1. The cucumber – slightly pickled in sugar and salt, then stir fried with some chillies and liver

2. The turnip – sliced into thin strips and stir fried with dark soy sauce

3. The “man chu keok” – pork knuckles simmered over slow fire with spices, sometimes with some chillies for extra kick

4. The “man ngap”– the stewed duck can come in three main variations, "foong ngap", “keong nga” with young ginger, or “hoi sam” with sea cucumber

5. The pig stomach pepper soup – good to the last drop

6. The steamed white chicken – mandatory for prayers and offerings to the ancestors, the accompanying chilli sauce usually makes or breaks this dish

7. The roast meats – roast pork, roast chicken, bbq pork... you can’t go wrong with these

8. The “nga ku” – fried with “nam yu”, these delicious little morsels are a perennial favourite

9. The Cina kuih – at least that’s what we call it. This deserves special mention as no one in the family makes it for CNY anymore. Made of rice flour, this steamed cake was often the preferred carb alternative to plain rice. It was delicious with any of the sauces from the pork knuckle or duck dishes. And the fun part was, you get to cut chunks out from the huge pan with just string....

Since my grandparents passed on, our reunion dinners have shrunk somewhat in size and grandeur.  Some don't make the journey back anymore.  As the family tree branches out further, the original nucleus grows smaller. But as families grow within families, they are also starting their own reunion dinners. While some of the old ways die off, new traditions continue to be forged. I do look back on the past with some nostalgia but I also look forward to equally (if not more) happy gatherings in the future too. I am lucky in that my family still makes time for reunion dinners.  We catch up with relatives, stuff our faces and enjoy the camaraderie. In the end though, as long as kinship and familial ties remain dear to us, it really shouldn’t matter what form the reunion takes place – a holiday, a dinner, a party.... And as long as the ang pows keep rolling in right???